White Elephant---Choking the Chicken

Shortly after Christmas, on what I believe is King's Day, (named after the three kings from the orient that brought gifts to the manger) some locals, (as in loco) assemble to whoop it up by bringing gifts to bare. The gifts are not for the Lord, but for the assembled desperadoes.

There was no myrrh, nor frankincense, certainly not gold, nor anything of real value. Well, I take that back because this year I got a bottle of wine apparently left over from the time of Christ or shortly after. It was found at the bottom of the Mediterranean in an intact amphora and tasted like it---very dry, if not sediment like, well aged, no resemblance to wine what so ever and much like sea water. Maybe it was a home brew. The best part of it was that it was presented in a leopard-skinned cozy with soft black fur on the top-- a very tasteless item but well suited to my world view. I was pleased.

The receiving of gifts was determined by draw, but individuals could pilfer others gift if they found them to be desirable and of some faintly possible value---value is a fleeting thing and subject to an individuals fancy or perversion. While most gifts appeared to be less than worthless, others generated real interest. In other words, the peace symbol made in the macrame area was seen as being dated and bordered on being virtually useless even in the company of the ancient hippies. I mean, like, this is so 60s, dude.

The items that received the greatest interest were the plastic chickens that when squeezed made noises like a choked chicken. While choking ones chicken must be a popular activity, these gifts went the next step and emanated numerous noises depending on the degree of choking. The hanging dead chicken had a death rattle sound as the air returned to the deflated bird. The chicken sitting on the chair was battery operated and had a selection of squawks depending on how hard it was choked.

It was a jewel and was garnered at every opportunity. While some individuals went into great speech as to the need for the babbling hen for some sick child, the final victor appeared to have other more devious intentions of using it for surprising some unsuspecting yahoo who needed surprising. Frankly, it took the expression "Choking your chicken" to a new level. Most thought there wasn't another level.

The joy of giving is a wonder. I noticed some gifts were left, but it was the thought.